Should I Celebrate Christmas with my Non-Muslim Family Members?

Question:

Assalam alaykum wa rahmat Allah wa barakatuh.

Every year that I let my family know I won't be celebrating Christmas together. Last year my mom gave us presents that stated they were from Santa Claus.At the moment, I was pregnant and it became more important for me that we distance ourselves from non-Islamic holidays.I understand growing up just how good the time was every year, and now that I hate making my parents feel really awful. I'm not quite sure how to describe it to them . I'm stuck between my mom with significant stress and my husband that does not really understand why it's really hard for them. Still another year is coming, and that I finally have a little girls, and I must explain to my mom why I can't see her at the time of year. I just watched them , and my mom already told me she's bought"Christmas" presents. What if I say or do to them which will make it simpler?

Answer:

You're having a difficult time reconciling the value of Christmas to your own parents while needing to boost your daughter sticking to Islamic traditions. It seems like your husband doesn't know the tension you're feeling when disappointing your parents year after year. You and your husband might not have discussed in detail how you'd celebrate holidays given your parents come from another tradition, before becoming married. Ever since your experience is totally foreign to your husband, he might not understand the importance of the holiday to the parents and the traditions that they created together with you as a kid. It can be quite hard for parents whose kids convert to Islam to understand "family traditions" will no longer be celebrated due to their kid's new beliefs.

You and your husband will have to talk about how you would like to approach holidays with your parents and discuss this information with your parents. Based on what you're comfortable with, you might decide to distance yourself from the loved ones together through the holidays or you might choose to join your parents in their heritage. You and your husband might need to decide together what's the best strategy for your loved ones. In case you've shared together with your parents that you don't celebrate Christmas and they insist on providing you and your kids presents, then you and your husband should reconcile the idea of accepting presents from family. Can it be a challenge to your religion or a feeling of jealousy and love out of your parents? Emulate the love you've got for your parents by knowing where they're coming from and communicating with them your ideas and views. As your kids grow and new traditions develop, your parents might learn how to adapt their traditions to what's more comfortable for you and your husband as well as join you on your religious traditions too.

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